Eight weeks to go. The training is progressing though sometimes it feels like really hard work. I've been going through these gates a lot recently. But are they the gates of heaven or hell? Going one way leads through into the deer park. Past the church and the obelisk. It can lead to a wonderful world of antlered deer stags, ice houses, world heritage, buzzards, the foothills of the dales, and a cafe with scones with clotted cream and strawberry jam. Heaven on earth. But it also leads to a very long mile uphill - the 'Studley Mile', up to it's very own Barkley gate at the top which I have to touch to complete a strength sapping speed interval. Eight minutes of hell doing each hill effort. Only to have to turn around and repeat, again and again. Or onwards through those gates at the top to do another 23 miles to complete a back-to-back-marathon-long-slow-trails-weekend. The thought of doing it is daunting. Going the other way through the gate is usually good. It'...
The doubts subside and I'm sleeping better and getting excited. Telling more people makes it real.
"Why are you doing this?" asks just about anyone* I've already bored with my plan, with a look of pained perplexion on their faces. (*Ultrarunners I know excepted - they just want to know more)
So I've been reminding myself that running is actually quite enjoyable. Yes it's hard, and yes there are times that I'd rather be sat relaxing in front of the wood-burning stove/drinking aperol spritz in the summer sun (delete as applicable depending on what time of the year you're reading this). But never after I've done a run - I'm always thankful I did it. And this type of ultra running is slow and it's ok to walk up hills. If you're out of breath you're running too fast. That sounds good, no? The challenge on a really long run is how much you can eat to keep fuelled up. I love food. It's just how my body reacts to it during the run I need to learn.
I've broken down what running gives me into 3 C's: Challenge, Community and Calmness.
Challenge
Pushing myself to do things that I thought I couldn't do gives me a sense of achievement. And achieveing something releases all sorts of positive brain chemicals. Keeping active (strength and aerobic) is something we all need to do as we age - it's the best medicine, bar none.
Community
Being part of a running club and parkrun, making new friends, sharing in others' achievements, volunteering for events, and doing it all with my best friend, running buddy, chief motivator and wife (same person!), imparts a sense of belonging and giving. Parkrun is where I got the bug to run.
Calmness
So I set off for my long run on a Saturday morning whilst staying the weekend in Shropshire helping plant some trees with friends. The hill tops coated in rising cloud. I run/walk up the road. A buzzard flies against the wind in the same direction and at the same speed as me, just metres away. We share a journey for what seems like hours. The dimples of sunlight on the other side of the valley. I'm released from my thoughts. The warm glow of completion as I return.
"Why are you doing this?" they ask.
"Why not?" I say.
But, two days of digging holes for trees, running down steep Shropshire hills and doing lunges incorrectly at the start of my new strength training regime takes its toll and my knee starts to hurt. Maybe it's the thought in my knee of 5 weeks of ultras! I lay off running for a week and do some cross training instead. I do parkrun - my knee holds out. Next day I do an 8-miler. Shouldn't have. Too much too soon. As my knee worsens, the doubt returns: what have I let myself in for?
I'd better get my training plan together. Time is ticking.
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